The essence of a relationship is to have someone to jubilate with in good times and a shoulder to cry on in bad times. A relationship is a binding agreement between two or more people with same or different personalities. For a relationship to succeed, it must be reciprocating with both parties contributing in one way or another. It´s supposed to be a give and take situation. Scratch my back I scratch your back; you share I share, you got problems I got answers – It becomes a burden and lopsided when one person just keeps giving while another keeps receiving either in material things or in opinions. As human beings, we go through our ups and downs on a consistent basis, sometimes more frequently than our counterpart. We shouldn’t expect one person to keep sharing their ups while another just keeps sharing their downs – nobody have it that good! We all face challenges and sharing our difficult moments with loved ones is a blessing and an opportunity to free oneself. I call it putting the bad blood to rest and freeing the spirit. ¨When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.¨ Job 2:11.
Even God knew we were going to face challenges, so He placed people in our lives to assist us through those difficult moments. Friends should open up to each other, advise each other, share life experiences with each other, entertain each other, be happy for one´s accomplishments and above all; speak the truth in love. We should share our problems to the right person and get the best of what is out there – and create room for growth and give others an opportunity to know that they are not alone in their own struggles. I share my struggles to help others with similar problems know that I am not perfect and just like them, I went through a similar situation and came out stronger, braver and became a living testimony. There is hope for the hopeless, and joy for the broken hearted and if I can do it they can as well. ¨Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.¨ 1 corinthians 13:6.
While in a relationship/friendship, we should understand that some people will always be better at somethings than their counterpart – some will be successful, others prettier/handsome, over achievers, ambitious, intelligent, wealthier, wiser, sexy and accomplished. Just as our fingers can never measure up to each other, we should refrain from measuring up to our friends – In the long run, jealous roots will be formed which can hinder our growth. We have all been blessed in different ways, we need to identify our own strengths, gifts, and talents the Lord has placed in our possession and use it to build each other up. Do not be envious when your friend´s outcome becomes more appealing than yours – you made the choice, so make the change! In every situation, there´s a lesson learned and a blessing. It´s never too late. Remember, you can´t help where you have been but the future is still within your reach. ¨See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. ¨Hebrews 12:15.
Relationships go through the test of time, we sometimes outgrow our friends just like our cloths. People grow and move up to bigger and better things in life while others choose to stay the same – either by choice or by circumstances. Some people may come in our life to transition us to the next stage in life while others will come to reap us or slow us from the prize ahead. As you grow your associates will change – is okay to recognize that and move on to something or someone capable of taking you to greater heights/contributing in your life. ¨A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.¨ Proverbs 18:24. Choose your friends wisely and share your problems only with those capable of contributing to the solution. Friendships are hard to keep and that is because we are an imperfect being. When in a relationship, there should be total trust and loyalty from both spectrum – If both parties are not properly investing in the relationship, it can become withered, bitter and weary.
Overtime, our lives begin to reflect that of our friends – show me your friends and I will show you who you are! The friends we make today will either take us higher of bring us lower, make us or break us, inspire or destroy us. The ball is in our court to make the right friendships. In prosperity our friends know us, in adversity we know our friends. Be a helpful friend and not a hateful friend and the Lord will bring His work to completion. ¨Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.¨ Proverbs 27:6.